Tuesday, June 12, 2012

From Momma Bear's Den: All Eyes On Me

You know how they say that Moms must have eyes in the backs of their heads or a sixth sense when it comes to their children?

How they can almost predict to the second what their child is doing even from several rooms away?

And all it takes is a sound (or in many cases the lack of sound) that triggers this phenomena?

Well, personally, I don't think that is just a Mom thing.

Why is that you ask?


*crouching low and whispering*

I think my children are psychic.

No joke.

They always seem to know what is going on in this house and who it's happening to.

They can predict your every move and they always seem to know when Papa Bear and I have done something that we don't want them to know about.

Case and point:

I'm in the kitchen the other night. Cleaning. Cooking supper. The usual.

I've been in there about an hour at this point getting everything done and it's been kinda nice because the boys are playing quietly in the bedroom.

So I decide I'm gonna have a little snack to reward myself.

Nothing major, just a packet of fruit snacks.

I grab the packet out of the basket, look up and...


...there are 2 little sets of brown eyes looking at me from behind the baby gates on either side of my kitchen.
How they got there I don't know. They weren't there when I bent over to get the snacks.

They just magically appeared.

Ready and waiting to mooch my fruit snacks.

And this isn't the only occasion that my children have demonstrated their supernatural abilities.

(Although I have noticed that most of these skills surface when food is involved. But that might just be a coincidence.)

No, I've seen these skills on many occasions.

Like last week when Papa Bear took a bite out of a granola bar.

Cub #2 strolls in and Papa Bear stops chewing before he is seen.

He smiles down to Cub #2 as though nothing is amiss and...


...Cub #2 starts clapping and whining for a bite of his own.

Just like that.

Now, mind you, Cub #2 is 14 months old. He isn't supposed to know these kinds of things.

(Side Note: We are teaching Cub #2 sign language and his version of the sign for more is to clap.)
Or how about the time when Cub #1 left his lunch plate on the table when he was "done" eating. (i.e. He had better things to do at the moment).

So after about an hour of it sitting there without him even coming into the room let along touching the food, I picked it up to clean.

Took the plate to the trash.

Opened the lid, threw in the half eaten mess and...


..."Mom, where's my plate. I wanna finish it now."

Never fails.

I don't know where they learned this trick or if it just comes naturally.

But I'm telling you. I need to have them tested.

Perhaps if I do and something comes of it they'll go grow up to work for high powered business execs who will rely on the talents of my little Cubs completely in order to run his company.
Hey, a mom can dream.


Thursday, February 16, 2012

From Momma Bear's Den: The World's Worse Virus

As a mother of 2 I'm often faced with the many viruses and illnesses that my cubs bring home from their worldly adventures.

Colds that have them coughing all over my newly scoured house, flus that have me running to find where on earth they have hidden the bucket (this time) before it's too late.

But recently I've had to deal with the worst virus I've ever encountered.

One that was so massive it has not only had me down for almost 2 1/2 months but it pretty much took away any access I've had to the outside world.

What kind of virus, you ask, could do so much damage for such an extended period of time?

A computer virus.

Not just any computer virus.

Oh no. Because that would be an easy fix and as anyone who knows me could tell you, my life has no easy fixes.

No, my computer somehow obtained a Trojan virus with spyware.

And not just one...

...but TWO.

Now, I'm not the most technically minded of women. I didn't realize exactly what this meant for my poor desktop friend, until my friend was no more. (I also didn't realize how close of friends we were. But we wont open that can of worms.)
But apparently, with a Trojan virus, it will completely take over your computer.

We're talking in-bed itself in any file it can, take it over, and pretty much laugh at you when you attempt to do anything with that file.

AND, not only that, but it can multiply itself within other files on your computer.

Essentially staging a hostile take-over and making you a sad, lonely, and bored, computer-less person, i.e. me the last 2 1/2 months.
After this lengthy explanation as to why I've been absent from my blogging obligations, you may be wondering what I've been doing to get myself through this though time.

So, let me tell you. I have become the cleaning Nazi.

Now, I've always kept a pretty clean house. There may have been a few extra toys laying about or a pile of papers I'd yet to find a place for, but my house was always visitor ready.

Until recently.

Recently my house has been spotless. Including my children. There wasn't a cluttered surface, a sticky finger-print, an unfolded t-shirt, or an unmade bed with-in 20 foot of my house.

I'm amazed by how much I was able to get (and to keep) done once there wasn't the distraction of a social life taking up the hours of my day.

Unfortunately for both my family and my home, the computer is back and so is my morning coffee, pop-tart, and Facebook breakfast.

The dishes will just have to wait until later.